wondering (and wandering)

i wonder how it feels
to be consumed with passion about something
or someone, maybe
but more of an experience
of not being able to breathe or sleep without working towards it
to the one that consumes your thoughts
the one that gets you out of bed every single day
and be the best you that you can be
(or not get out of it out of the sheer helplessness of wanting)
because knowing that you didn’t give your all
would break your heart
because it deserves your best
it deserves your all
and so much more

i wonder how that feels
and i’m scared
because i might spend the rest of my life wondering


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